Monday, May 17, 2010
Mr. Darcy vs. Dr. Phil
So, where does a girl in her late 20's go to meet other singles (preferably male) besides bars? I mean, honestly...it seems that almost all my friends are either married, getting married, getting divorced or have resigned themselves to other states of mind that do not involve dating.
Several years ago, in another fit of emotional meltdown, I read "Love Smart" by Dr. Phil. Surprisingly it was very insightful, but I distinctly remember him suggesting that you put yourself in "target-rich environments." If you want a manly man who does housework and yardwork and enjoys the outdoors, go hang out in a Home Depot or a Bass Pro Shops, was the doctor's suggestion. If you like guys that are into sports, go hang out at those sporting events. Seems pretty simple...until you find yourself standing in the lumber aisle of Home Depot for 30 minutes after several associates ask if you need assistance and then page Security overhead to do a scan of the lumber department. This isn't simple at all! So, you're sitting at a Braves game...then what? Do you just start randomly introducing yourself to people until maybe, just maybe, you find someone else who was desperate enough to read anything by Dr. Phil?
I also attempted to read "He's Just Not That Into You," prior to the movie release. It was too painfully obvious. Every situation in that book was for desperate women, it seemed. Women who couldn't see that they were being treated like pond scum or women who didn't seem to have any kind of self-respect. I consider myself to be pretty in tune with what's acceptable and what's not when it comes to any kind of relationship.
Dr. Phil talks about how women have been trained to think that there is a perfect man out there and therefore, we overlook our potential "Mr. 80%." He said that wouldn't you rather be 80% happy than 100% alone? Sounds, again, pretty simple. But, really, doesn't it sound a bit like settling? I made the mistake of watching 3 minutes of "Pride & Prejudice" this weekend, which is always a recipe for disaster with a broken heart. My head says that Mr. 80% is what I should be looking for. My heart says to stick around and wait for my Mr. Darcy. And if you know any unattached male in the general vicinity of the age of 30 who is even aware of who Mr. Darcy is, please...introduce him to your friend. :)